Unique And Humorous Gifts For Wine Lovers
1. The Wine Rack
The follow up to the successful Beer Belly, the Wine Rack makes sneaking booze into events an equal opportunity scam.
Beer belly full? Why not fill up your rack?
You can get 25 oz. of wine in this unique wine gift. That's five glasses if you are using the standard 5 oz. pour. I have a feeling anyone wearing this isn't using the standard pour.
The bra sizes run from 34A through 34D. The bra is machine washable and the bladder inside needs to be hand washed.
When would you use this? We could see you wearing this to a concert, sporting event, the opera, or ballet. This is a way to get some lower-cost wine into venues that charge way too much for their booze. According to the manufacturer, it also makes a fun gift!
2. The Sir Perky Wine Accessory Kit
I'm trying to picture the meeting where someone pitched this idea to the manufacturer. What real-life experiences were they calling on when this design came to mind? How thought these would be popular gifts for wine lovers?
This line of wine accessories started out with the simple stopper and has grown into a little family of curious characters.
These are best left in the cabinet when grandma comes over for a glass of wine. Or when you invite your new friends from the PTA over for a few glasses.
The manufacturer describes these unique wine accessories as being made of rock-hard plastic and perfect for as a novelty gift. With this set, you get a bottle opener, corkscrew, stopper, and bottle topper. This is one of our favorite "white elephant" gifts for wine lovers.
3. Cat Engraved Wine Glass
Some people need to justify solo drinking and want to be reminded of it on their glass. Others have a pathological love of felines. we don't fall into either camp, so this glass just seems weird.
We are usually too busy drinking our wine to read any clever content printed on them, but if you want to let your freak flag fly, here you go. Grab one of these babies. Don't like this version, there are plenty of wine glasses with stuff about cats on them. We don't know why.
This glass holds 15 oz of wine and dishwasher safe. It makes a great gift for lonely people that drink with cats. Please do not let your cat drink wine out of it. Please!
Someday we will publish our complete list of the best cat gifts for wine lovers. We promise to let you know when we do.
4. Alien Wine Bottle Holder
Who is ordering these? Seriously. X-Files fans maybe? Do X-Files fans still exist?
This creepy little wine bottle holder is supposed to be an alien chugging a bottle of Merlot or whatever you choose to put in its strange little hands. The fact that this looks more like a human baby or embryo ups the ick factor considerably.
This incredibly strange bottle holder is made of polyresin and it weighs 3lbs without the wine bottle added. The makers of this wine accessory feel ownership is a great way to show off your love of wine.
Where exactly they think this should be placed in your house isn't clear. Maybe in the nursery? This is definitely one of the oddest gifts for wine lovers out there.
5. Drinking Buddies
There is nothing worse than realizing you just drank out of someone else's wine glass. Who knows where their mouth has been. Or even worse, you may actually know where it's been. That's why we like to thank the lord for Drinking Buddies. You will know which version of JC blessed your glass.
There are four markers in the pack. They are described as Christ T., JC, J-Dawg and Kanye. Not really clear on the Kanye references, but it must make sense to someone.
You can hang the little Jesus on the side of your glass and the manufacturers promise you will avoid the embarrassing glass mix-ups that happen when the wine is flowing. This is no guarantee that you can fill the glass with water and it will be turned into wine. But it's worth a try.
This is one set of buddies in the long line of drinking buddy options. Not a fan of the lord? You can get cowboys in chaps instead! Truly one of the great novelty gifts for wine lovers.
6. Wine Condoms
If these practical wine stoppers were called wine balloons, no one would look twice. The concept is solid. The condom creates an airtight lid on the bottle. This is essential if you want to keep your wine from going bad.
We know, many of you have never actually but a half-empty bottle back. But for those of us who have, this is a nice option. The wine condom doesn't protrude out of the bottle, so you can fit it into your dorm fridge more easily. These condoms are designed to be re-used, so keep that in mind.
Even with the practicality of them, these are still a novelty wine accessory. They make a great gag gift for wine lovers. According to the manufacturer, there are tons of celebrities who absolutely love these things. So if you often consult celebrities for your wine storage options, you should feel good making this purchase.
The manufacturer also suggests carrying the wine condoms in a purse or wallet. That seems like terrible advice.
The reviews on Amazon are solid and we have noticed they are often sold out, so whip out your wallet and order some.
8. Horse Hoof Pick Wine Opener
So this seems like a very practical gift for your friends that don't know cars were invented. I guess it would also extend to people who drink wine while playing Polo (we do not endorse drinking and playing Polo).
This combines all the functionality of a high-quality horse hoof pick with the ease of a waiters' corkscrew. We could see needing this...well...never. But there are tons of people who do need it, so add it to your wine accessories for the holidays' list.
This could also be a practical tool for cleaning your teeth before and after drinking. That seems to have a wider market application.
9. Wine Flask Bracelet
The classier version of the "wine rack" this is another way to evade "liquor from home" restrictions. I always wondered why my elementary school teachers wore such gaudy bracelets to class.
There is little detail on what the bracelet flask is made of. The website selling them only offers. "For those who never want to be caught without a backup libation, secretly sip in style with this innovative bracelet flask"
We are thinking you may want to seek help if you need to fill your bracelet with booze just to make it through the day. But who the hell are we to judge?
10. Wine Bottle Holder High Heels
We first discovered this bizarre wine accessory gift at one of the big wine warehouses. At first, we thought someone had lost a shoe and a nice person in the store put it up on the shelf. Then we saw more of these and thought, that's a lot of people to lose high heels in a wine warehouse at noon on a Tuesday.
To our utter disbelief, we were told they were actually meant to be purchased. These are for holding up wine bottles? When does this need arise?
Can someone who has purchased one of these unique wine gifts please write in and tell us when they use this? Is it something you leave on the counter all the time? Do you pull out "the shoe" for special dates? I need answers and no one seems to have them.
